Jumbled

I'm trying to write down all the feelings and thoughts I have going on but I haven't been successful. It's like they are all battling to get out first. So if this post seems confusing and jumbled I am sorry. But I want to write today about my daily battle. It's goes a little something like this...

I woke up this morning and got Coop ready for school. Other than Miss Molly being a menace (Coop has given her this title) everything was easy going and smooth sailing. Then we loaded up in the car and went to pick up the girls we carpool with. Coop isn't too thrilled to stuck in a car with a bunch of girls each morning. Now if this were Jr high...  While taking the kids to school I was my silly goofy self, singing in the car and teasing with the kids. Then I dropped them off with a "BYE! Have fun today and be safe. LOVE YOU!!!" and Molls and I headed home. Our routine continues with me getting Molly some breakfast and I check emails and social media while she eats.

While browsing through Facebook I came across an interview with Nicki Minaj on the Jimmy Fallon Show. I love Jimmy Fallon and it said something about high school pictures so I had to see. Well as they were chatting they mentioned her song Anaconda (hate that song) and how it is a huge hit and that the video on YouTube has millions and millions of views. Curiosity got to me and I had to see why it is so crazy popular. I honestly don't like that song and I was pretty sure that the video wouldn't be any better but I clicked on the video and it began to play.

Now I may be getting old and lame but I wanted to cry as I watched it. These beautiful women using their bodies as objects to be used in such a demeaning way. To be honest... I cried. I cried for where our world has gotten. I cried for the lack of self respect in these women. I cried because the lyrics were so far from having any value. They were terrible and damaging. I cried for my daughter and all those little girls, teenagers and young women growing up in a world with influences like this. I cried for my son and all the young men in the world who are being shown that treating women this way isn't just OK but glorified. I cried because we have given this song, the music video and it's artist such praise.

I worry about what media like this will do to my son and my daughter. Will I be able to give them enough to fight the worsening battle of sexual media vs. respect and love for oneself and others. I worry about what my children will be faced with in the future.

One day we were in the car (side note: we only listen to the iPod, radio Disney or "oldies" stations in the car) and Cooper started singing, "What ya gonna do with that big fat butt? Wiggle wiggle wiggle..." Needless to say I wasn't pleased hearing that song come from my son. I hate that song. And I came to learn that while at another family's house he saw a video on YouTube of a cat shakin it's butt and they put it to that song. Funny... kind of. Appropriate for my 8 yr old? No. So I did what any parent should do... I talked to him about why it's not a good song and if I hear him sing it again I will not be happy. I told him how women and girls are daughter's of God and that as a man he has to make sure he is doing what he can to treat girls with respect. I also talked to him about how he deserves better as well because he is a son of God and that he is special and needs to keep higher standards. I explained to him how that song is disrespectful to women. And I spend a lot of time explaining what standards, respect, appropriate and a bunch of other words meant. I have learned that I can't just talk to him... I have to teach him.

I think a lot of parents are worried to teach their young children about these kinds of things but unfortunately it is necessary. If we do not give our children the tools they need to fight this battle they face in life how can we expect them to win it? And we need to have for faith in our children. They are strong beautiful spirits. We have to believe in them. We have to arm them with the tools they need. We have to lead them. We have to be there for them.

My blog is my tool... My soapbox if you must. I pray everyday that I can use this tool to help others know what I know. And that is this... Love is the way. Love for oneself. Love for each other. Love for our lives. Love is the only way to win the battle. If we love our children we will take the time to teach them about who they are, what they deserve as a child of God, and that everyone else deserves it as well. Please take the time to teach your children that EVERY LIFE MATTERS. They matter. Their feelings matter. Their future matters. Their dreams matter. And make sure they know that media is not reality. The lives we live in our homes, with the people we love, that is reality.

OK... Ran over. I'm pretty sure this will all just be confusing for you all to read. Sorry. I told you it would be a a jumbled mess.

XOXO,

Katie

Every Life Matters Q&A - Emily Dalton

Are you ready for another E.L.M. Q&A??? I know I am! When I was first playing with the idea of doing this series I was trying to think of people who I would like to have featured. My friend Emily was one of the first names on my very long list and when she said she would do it I was so excited. Emily is one of the coolest women I know. I went to high school with Emily and had lost touch with her until the blessing that is social media reconnected us. I love her awesome personality, amazing sense of style, crazy awesome creativity, and she is pretty much SUPER MOM raising 5 daughters!!! I'm losing my mind just raising one. I am so happy to have Emily be a part of my life and now a part of my Q&A series. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you... Emily Dalton!

Tell us a bit about yourself.

My name is Emily Dalton. I'm first most a mother of 5 beautiful girls, next, wife to my handsome husband, a believer of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, owner of my own business, and aspiring nurse.   That's a lot of things! Don't worry, they don't all work out at the same time. 

Who matters to you?

In my introduction I listed some of the most important people in my life. My family is always first! My husband is my glue. He holds my life together and I don't know what I'd do without him. My kids are my life right now. They were entrusted to me to help them grow healthy and happy and I, like so many other mothers, am so overwhelmed and blessed with this task. I also have many friends in my life, new and old, that are so very important to me. I've been truly blessed to be part of a very special friendship with 4 other ladies since college. We are inseparable and have been through so much together. This last year has been a very heartbreaking year for us five friends. And things we have been through have made a profound difference in all our life's. 

How do you show them that they matter to you?

With all the important people in my life, I find myself easily stressed with showing them all how much I love them. Compassion and service are attributes of mine that I put above my own needs. This isn't always in every one's best interest though. So I try to balance my time with the most important people/things in my life. 

It's funny as I answer these great questions I find myself being self critical. How many of us are like that?! I would say a lot. I'm going to try to stick with your q&a motto and give myself the credit I should everyday. 

So back to the question!  I get up every morning (much earlier then I would like to) and get my girls up fed and ready for school. Despite their many attempted dissuasion's. While my older three are gone I have fun with, all while teaching, my two littlest littles what a house wife should do. Clean, cook, nap. You know important life essentials. In between my daily chores and changing diapers I promote and run my business. I run this business because we need the money. The business to me is much more then money though. And I will explain in future questions. I then welcome my scholarly children home from school and try to keep my patience during that dreaded hour trying to cram homework, after school snacks/free time and preparing dinner. You all know what I'm talking about right? I've heard many call it the witching hour. Nuff said. After putting on a strenuous smile to welcome husband home, I feed my family, finish up being task master and tuck my kiddos into bed. Then it's either back to work promoting/running business or spending time with with my sweet, often neglected husband. 

Sorry for the run down of my daily grind. I felt it was important, mostly for myself, to list the things I do for my loved ones every day. There is always more to the day that I don't see coming as well. Life is very good at throwing all kinds of extra crap at you that you weren't planning on dealing with. It slows your other tasks way down and gets me down often. This is the time that I turn to what should have been my number one task, God. Prayer, scripture study, Sunday school. These are the way I show my love to my Heavenly Father. And really they are the ways he gives his love to me. 

Lastly my friends. Oh how I wish I had more time to show my love for my friends! Calls, texts, social media posts. That's all it seems to be the busier my life gets. We get together every month or so. To all my friends out there, know that I wish I could do more!! Prayers are also another way I give them my love. Lots and lots of prayers!

Tell us about a time in your life when someone has made you feel like you mattered.

Hey this one time!! Honestly I keep wondering why you would've picked me to be featured on your awesome blog. I'm not anyone special except to a few certain littles. At least that's what my mean voice inside my head tells me. But to try and think about times that I have felt like I mattered there are a few prominent thoughts that come to mind.

1- Of course every time my children are in pain I feel important. I need to help them and most times I'm the only one that can give them comfort. 2-Whenever I get a calling in my church.  Nothing can make me as scared and flattered at the same time as a "calling from God" as my church leaders say when asking service from a member such as I. And then there's the personal thanks from other members after I give a lesson. Feels great. 

3- when I'm successful in my business. So here's my business explanation I promised. I sell women's and girls clothing via mostly home parties. It's something I never saw myself doing. I never threw parties and I was never confident in asking other people to "do" something for me. Well this new business I've invested in has given me that kind of confidence and more. Because people don't just buy a product from me, they buy the idea that I show them. Not sure if I'm explaining this right but the point is that I love my product & how it makes me feel & I have learned to show my confidence and love to others to be successful at what I do. 

4- Lastly, it never fails, when I can serve or help someone out I feel like I'm worth a million!

Tell us about a time in your life when you haven't felt like you mattered. How did you overcome that?

I'm sad to say that I tell myself that I don't matter too often, but happy to say that it happens less and less as I get older. I think back at high school (ie the most insecure time of my life) and am so thankful for that time to be over and to have the knowledge I do now that all my worries and insecurities were ridiculous at that time. Words from others have such a huge affect at those young years. I can thank my husband and his tremendous love for erasing those ill intentions other kids did. And I am able to forgive those who made me feel inadequate because I now know that those years were probably just as hard for them and that most have probably grown up to be fine men and women. And if they don't feel sorry about it now, it really doesn't matter! I have many who love me and their love is all I need. What an amazing truth!!

Life can get pretty crazy and there are a lot of distractions and things to get us off track. How do you keep focus on what matters most to you in your life?

Luckily I have five little reminders and one amazing man to keep me focused on what really matters in life. Every time I am told I am loved. Every time I stop to look at the beauty and blessings around me. Every time I turn my devotion to God. And each morning when I wake up to a new day full of potential to do better, I am reminded of what this life is really about. It's a crazy hard life, but it's a good one!

If you could give one message to those reading this what would it be?

This last year I've had to see several of my most loved ones go through the biggest struggles of their life's. Things that are much too common in this world but that I never really was able to fathom the immense pain involved. Suicide, loss, divorce, depression and addiction. Horrible experiences to have to watch my family and dearest friends go through. And the one thing I want to make known to everyone reading this would be that nothing is ever bad enough to end your life for! You can get through it. You have someone that loves you and you need to do what you need to to be there with them. It's hard. It's so very very hard, but you can do it! Please seek help. You know when you need it!  Now I also want to make it known that the horrible things I mentioned above happen and that there is healing and forgiveness for those affected by them. That when we witness these hard times in others we need to give our love and understand and act only with love. Love is universal and everyone needs more of it and needs to give more of it. The 

With much love from your friend,

Emily Dalton

I was here.

My heart has been heavy these last few days. I have been thinking a lot about life and family and how each day is a blessing. A family friend passed away on Tuesday. Her name is Heidi and I always thought she had the best smile. She was only 38 or 39 years old. Her husband is a widower. Her children are motherless. Their lives were changed so tragically. And my heart is breaking for them.

This morning I woke up alone. My husband goes to woke early in the morning. He didn't wake me up this morning to kiss me goodbye. I don't like when he doesn't wake me up. But I am thankful that I can be mad at him for dumb little things like that. I'm glad that I didn't get a goodbye kiss because he didn't want to wake me and not because he wasn't here to give me a kiss.

This morning I woke up to my baby screaming her head off. She isn't sweet when she first wakes up. She's a screamer and will scream until you get her out of her crib. It's not easy having such a stubborn sassy baby. She wears me out so much lately. But I am thankful that I have those screams each morning. I wouldn't know what to do if one day they stopped. I don't even want to imagine it. 

This morning I spent an hour telling my son to hurry and eat, hurry and brush his teeth, hurry and get dressed. If I'm not on him every other minute he would never be ready. It's so frustrating. I got after him when he was in the bathroom for 5 minutes playing in the sink when he was supposed to be brushing his teeth. And at that moment is when it hit me. I wouldn't trade it. I'm thankful I have him here and that I have to follow him around so he will get ready for school and not end up in day-dreamland or mess around with the sink or forget his glasses. I'm thankful I get to do it each morning no matter how much it has annoyed me in the past. To have him here is worth all the hectic mornings.

So you see... I had a perfectly normal exhausting morning. I didn't have anything different happen. It was not smooth or easy going. It wasn't picture perfect. But it was my life with the people I love. I was here... They were here. What more could I ask for? 

Hug a little tighter... a little longer. Look at your life and see the blessing. Thank God for what you have been given. And if you can, will you please say a prayer for Heidi's family. They need so many prayers to help hold their broken hearts together.

XOXO,

Katie

A good day.

We went up into the mountains yesterday to go get us a Christmas tree. I love the mountains! I have said it many times but I have to say it again.... I LOVE LIVING IN UTAH!!! I am so blessed to have been born and raised here and now to be able to raise my kids here. So much beauty and adventure to be found!

So yesterday was a good day. Church was great! I love being able to attend church and partake of the blessing the gospel provides me and my family. I was reminded further how much love Christ has for us all. This is the Christmas season and I let myself get stressed out and caught up in the commercial part of the holiday. Yesterday I was able to let all those stresses go and feel the amazing spirit of this wonderful season.

After we got home we got changed and loaded up into the truck. With Christmas music flowing and happy children in the backseat we set out to find our tree. I loved being with me little family. I love being able to make these memories together. Cooper was so funny as he kept yelling out "THAT ONE!" as we passed HUGE trees that would never fit into our little home. Dustin and I would stop to check out this tree or that one... Is it too big? Too bare? Too tall? Too skinny? After driving until the road was closed and hoping out and hiking a bit we found our simple and beautiful tree. My heart beat extra strong, not just from the hiking, but from how happy I was to see my little family together and seeing how happy they were as well. My husband is meant for the mountains. We need to find us a little cabin to live in. You can see him when he is out in the beauty our Utah home. And our kids are both so curious and adventurous. Cooper has always loved being outside and is always telling me about his plans to hike this mountain or explore. I feel guilty that I haven't been better and been on more adventures with him. 

OK... Get ready for a side road to this post that I didn't plan on writing but have to now... I have been on a long and bumpy journey when it comes to my self image, confidence and body image. I have been overweight for so long and I haven't been able to conquer that hurdle yet. Yes I want to be skinnier! Yes I want to fit into clothes better. Yes I am tired of feeling like the fat girl... But the biggest reason I want to lose weight is to be in better shape and healthier! I want to be able to take my kids on adventures and not worry about being able to actually do it. I want to be able to keep up with my husband (who has a metabolism I would kill for) when we go out into the mountains. I want to climb that mountain with Cooper. I want to be healthier so I don't hold myself and my family back... (Side road done. Back to the purpose of this post.) :)

I believe very strongly that a family that enjoys the simple things together like the Christmas tree hunting, singing Christmas songs in the car, and joking and being silly will be the strong families. As parents we need to spend time with our children so we can have strong relationships with them. Taking a couple of hours to go drive into the mountains and chopping down a tree might not seem like much to some... But to me and to my family it is priceless.

Here are a few photos (poor quality phone pics, sorry) from our little outing... Enjoy.

XOXO,

Katie

Every Life Matters Q&A - Michelle Petersen

Here we go again! It's time for another E.L.M. Q&A. YAY! This one is from the ever so wonderful Michelle Petersen from the Mumsy Blog. Michelle is one of the most beautifully genuine souls I have ever met. I just love who she is! I was so lucky to meet her last July and feel her amazing energy first hand. Since then I have been able to get to know her further through social media, texting, and email. I can tell you without a doubt that she knows what matters in life and I had to have her be a part of my Q&A series. I just know you will love the 4th go round of the Every Life Matters Q&A featuring the fabulous Michelle Petersen. We could learn a lot from this woman...

Tell us a bit about yourself.

First things first, I love being a Mom.  Sure, there are many moments when I feel like an absolute crazy person and am 99% convinced that my three children are possessed; but I wouldn't have it any other way.  I was meant to be a Mom.  Aside from that, I am a born and raised Utah gal, Mormon, world traveler, extrovert, former elementary teacher, musician, closeted dirty dancer, and a self proclaimed keeper of random facts.

Who matters to you?

God, my family, and my friends.

How do you show them that they matter to you?

Striving daily to do/be my best and openly show my love for them.  When it comes down to it, I believe that service and genuine thoughtfulness are the best ways in which I can show those I care about that they matter to me.  So each day I find a way in which I can serve and openly show my love to others.  Oh, and I also thinks it's important to continuously strive to do/be my best.  Because, when I take the time to work on myself, I in turn can reflect on who I am as a person and how my actions affect those around me.

Tell us about a time in your life when someone has made you feel like you mattered.

There are many ways that others have made me feel like I mattered. But, the one that currently comes to mind is my sweet neighbor and friend Lena Mae.  We have know each other for almost 5 years now, and ever since the first day I met her, she has taken the time to carefully make meaningful handmade trinkets that she gives my family and me for each of our birthdays and every holiday in between.  Although she is nearly 60 years older than me, I have developed a very close kinship with her and couldn't imagine my life without her in it.

Tell us about a time in your life when you haven't felt like you mattered.

Throughout my entire childhood and early teenage years, I was bullied by people I thought were my friends.  It was a very hard time in my life. 

How did you overcome that?

My Mom.  She taught me that it was O.K. to be sad about what was happening to me but that after I took some time to mourn, I had to pick my self up, dust myself off, and move forward.  Things can always be worse.  People can slow you down, but they can't stop you unless you allow them to do so.  

What matters most to you?

How others feel when they are around me.  I know what it feels like to be around those who are more than happy to dim your light so theirs will shine brighter, and I never want to be placed in that category of people.  When people are around me, I want them to know they are special and that they matter to me.

Life can get pretty crazy and there are a lot of distractions and things to get us off track. How do you keep what matters most to you in the forefront of your life?

By reminding myself that stuff is just stuff.  People, and our relationships with them are what matters most.  Obviously, I can't please everyone.  But, even in those moments when I don't see eye to eye with someone, or simply can't stand them, I'm still going to do all that I can to be kind to those around me.  Though I can't control the actions of others, I can control my own; and never want a day to go by in which I feel that I didn't live up to my full potential.

If you could give one message to those reading this what would it be?

Life is hard, but it is beautiful too.  People make it beautiful.  YOU make it beautiful because you matter!  

Reminders.

Last week was a busy one. We went home for Thanksgiving and family time. It was great! For Thanksgiving we spent it out at Uncle Tom's cabin. Seriously... It's my Uncle Tom and Aunt Kay's cabin. I have loved going out there growing up and now I love being able to take my kids. Cooper had to be with his dad this Thanksgiving though so being out there without him was hard. He loves it there. But it was great to spend a couple days with my family. I love them so much.

The day after Thanksgiving we were so blessed to get to have Cooper baptized with his cousin Mason. Those two have been buds since birth and for them to be able to share this special step in life was great. Cooper was baptized in the same baptismal font I was baptized in oh so many years ago. It was so amazing and I am so proud of him. He has grown up to be such a special boy. Before he was baptized we made sure to spend time these last couple months to really talk to him about the purpose of baptism and how important this decision is. We read scriptures, watched videos, and talked a lot about what it means to be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. We talked to him about the gift of the Holy Ghost and our promise we make when we are baptized. We asked him questions and let him ask us questions. And as it grew closer to his baptism day I truly felt a peaceful feeling that told me that Cooper was ready and knew what he was doing. I can't wait to watch him grow and be a part of his growth in the gospel.

So after Thanksgiving on Thursday and Cooper's baptism on Friday I am more thankful than ever before for the life I have chosen to live with the people I love and in the state I love! And I am so very thankful that each and every day I am given little (and sometimes big) reminders of what life is really about and what matters most in life.

Here are a few of those reminders I received last week...

Sunrise Thanksgiving morning. This is my favorite time of day at one of my favorite spots on earth.

A little snuggle time with daddy.

She discovered a little patch of snow and was so curious. She hasn't really played in snow yet since she was so tiny last winter.

She loved exploring and running around. 

This is one of my favorite photos ever. She sat there and played with a couple sticks, a rock and the grass for so long. This my friends is childhood unplugged!

One of the photos Dustin took while they were fishing in the creek. I have tubed and played in this creek many times and I need to take Coop tubing next summer!

Love these two so much. I just wish Cooper could have been there too. 

The sunset Thanksgiving day was beyond beautiful! I seriously went all the way around and filled the sky with the most amazing colors! My family has a love for the clouds and sky so we were all out taking photos and enjoying this beauty.

SERIOUSLY PEOPLE! The skies in Utah are so amazing!

Me and my girl enjoying the sunset.

And aren't Miss Molly's piggies so adorable!

Cooper and his cousin Mason. Cousins are the very best!

Our little family after Cooper's baptism. I am so blessed to call them mine.

XOXO,

Katie

To my Mr on his birthday.

(I can't tell you how much I love this picture!)

Today my husband is celebrating his 32nd birthday. WOOHOO!!!  I won't go on and on (although I want to) about how amazing he is and how much I FREAKIN love him. He would just get embarrassed. Instead I will just say this... 

Dear Husband,

I am eternally grateful for the blessing you are in my life and the lives of our children. I love you more than words can say. And I will do all I can all my life and forever to prove to you how much I truly love you. Thank you for putting up with the emotional roller coaster that is my life. Thank you for being such a great cook. Thank you for making me see life differently and for making me chill out when I need to. Thank you for almost always being the first one to apologize after a fight. I promise to be less stubborn. Thank you for making me laugh and smile when I want to be mad at you. But most of all... Thank you for letting me love you and  for loving me in return. I can't wait to spend the next 32 years with ya!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Love ya!

XOXO,

Mrs. Dotson