I was here.

My heart has been heavy these last few days. I have been thinking a lot about life and family and how each day is a blessing. A family friend passed away on Tuesday. Her name is Heidi and I always thought she had the best smile. She was only 38 or 39 years old. Her husband is a widower. Her children are motherless. Their lives were changed so tragically. And my heart is breaking for them.

This morning I woke up alone. My husband goes to woke early in the morning. He didn't wake me up this morning to kiss me goodbye. I don't like when he doesn't wake me up. But I am thankful that I can be mad at him for dumb little things like that. I'm glad that I didn't get a goodbye kiss because he didn't want to wake me and not because he wasn't here to give me a kiss.

This morning I woke up to my baby screaming her head off. She isn't sweet when she first wakes up. She's a screamer and will scream until you get her out of her crib. It's not easy having such a stubborn sassy baby. She wears me out so much lately. But I am thankful that I have those screams each morning. I wouldn't know what to do if one day they stopped. I don't even want to imagine it. 

This morning I spent an hour telling my son to hurry and eat, hurry and brush his teeth, hurry and get dressed. If I'm not on him every other minute he would never be ready. It's so frustrating. I got after him when he was in the bathroom for 5 minutes playing in the sink when he was supposed to be brushing his teeth. And at that moment is when it hit me. I wouldn't trade it. I'm thankful I have him here and that I have to follow him around so he will get ready for school and not end up in day-dreamland or mess around with the sink or forget his glasses. I'm thankful I get to do it each morning no matter how much it has annoyed me in the past. To have him here is worth all the hectic mornings.

So you see... I had a perfectly normal exhausting morning. I didn't have anything different happen. It was not smooth or easy going. It wasn't picture perfect. But it was my life with the people I love. I was here... They were here. What more could I ask for? 

Hug a little tighter... a little longer. Look at your life and see the blessing. Thank God for what you have been given. And if you can, will you please say a prayer for Heidi's family. They need so many prayers to help hold their broken hearts together.

XOXO,

Katie

A good day.

We went up into the mountains yesterday to go get us a Christmas tree. I love the mountains! I have said it many times but I have to say it again.... I LOVE LIVING IN UTAH!!! I am so blessed to have been born and raised here and now to be able to raise my kids here. So much beauty and adventure to be found!

So yesterday was a good day. Church was great! I love being able to attend church and partake of the blessing the gospel provides me and my family. I was reminded further how much love Christ has for us all. This is the Christmas season and I let myself get stressed out and caught up in the commercial part of the holiday. Yesterday I was able to let all those stresses go and feel the amazing spirit of this wonderful season.

After we got home we got changed and loaded up into the truck. With Christmas music flowing and happy children in the backseat we set out to find our tree. I loved being with me little family. I love being able to make these memories together. Cooper was so funny as he kept yelling out "THAT ONE!" as we passed HUGE trees that would never fit into our little home. Dustin and I would stop to check out this tree or that one... Is it too big? Too bare? Too tall? Too skinny? After driving until the road was closed and hoping out and hiking a bit we found our simple and beautiful tree. My heart beat extra strong, not just from the hiking, but from how happy I was to see my little family together and seeing how happy they were as well. My husband is meant for the mountains. We need to find us a little cabin to live in. You can see him when he is out in the beauty our Utah home. And our kids are both so curious and adventurous. Cooper has always loved being outside and is always telling me about his plans to hike this mountain or explore. I feel guilty that I haven't been better and been on more adventures with him. 

OK... Get ready for a side road to this post that I didn't plan on writing but have to now... I have been on a long and bumpy journey when it comes to my self image, confidence and body image. I have been overweight for so long and I haven't been able to conquer that hurdle yet. Yes I want to be skinnier! Yes I want to fit into clothes better. Yes I am tired of feeling like the fat girl... But the biggest reason I want to lose weight is to be in better shape and healthier! I want to be able to take my kids on adventures and not worry about being able to actually do it. I want to be able to keep up with my husband (who has a metabolism I would kill for) when we go out into the mountains. I want to climb that mountain with Cooper. I want to be healthier so I don't hold myself and my family back... (Side road done. Back to the purpose of this post.) :)

I believe very strongly that a family that enjoys the simple things together like the Christmas tree hunting, singing Christmas songs in the car, and joking and being silly will be the strong families. As parents we need to spend time with our children so we can have strong relationships with them. Taking a couple of hours to go drive into the mountains and chopping down a tree might not seem like much to some... But to me and to my family it is priceless.

Here are a few photos (poor quality phone pics, sorry) from our little outing... Enjoy.

XOXO,

Katie

Every Life Matters Q&A - Michelle Petersen

Here we go again! It's time for another E.L.M. Q&A. YAY! This one is from the ever so wonderful Michelle Petersen from the Mumsy Blog. Michelle is one of the most beautifully genuine souls I have ever met. I just love who she is! I was so lucky to meet her last July and feel her amazing energy first hand. Since then I have been able to get to know her further through social media, texting, and email. I can tell you without a doubt that she knows what matters in life and I had to have her be a part of my Q&A series. I just know you will love the 4th go round of the Every Life Matters Q&A featuring the fabulous Michelle Petersen. We could learn a lot from this woman...

Tell us a bit about yourself.

First things first, I love being a Mom.  Sure, there are many moments when I feel like an absolute crazy person and am 99% convinced that my three children are possessed; but I wouldn't have it any other way.  I was meant to be a Mom.  Aside from that, I am a born and raised Utah gal, Mormon, world traveler, extrovert, former elementary teacher, musician, closeted dirty dancer, and a self proclaimed keeper of random facts.

Who matters to you?

God, my family, and my friends.

How do you show them that they matter to you?

Striving daily to do/be my best and openly show my love for them.  When it comes down to it, I believe that service and genuine thoughtfulness are the best ways in which I can show those I care about that they matter to me.  So each day I find a way in which I can serve and openly show my love to others.  Oh, and I also thinks it's important to continuously strive to do/be my best.  Because, when I take the time to work on myself, I in turn can reflect on who I am as a person and how my actions affect those around me.

Tell us about a time in your life when someone has made you feel like you mattered.

There are many ways that others have made me feel like I mattered. But, the one that currently comes to mind is my sweet neighbor and friend Lena Mae.  We have know each other for almost 5 years now, and ever since the first day I met her, she has taken the time to carefully make meaningful handmade trinkets that she gives my family and me for each of our birthdays and every holiday in between.  Although she is nearly 60 years older than me, I have developed a very close kinship with her and couldn't imagine my life without her in it.

Tell us about a time in your life when you haven't felt like you mattered.

Throughout my entire childhood and early teenage years, I was bullied by people I thought were my friends.  It was a very hard time in my life. 

How did you overcome that?

My Mom.  She taught me that it was O.K. to be sad about what was happening to me but that after I took some time to mourn, I had to pick my self up, dust myself off, and move forward.  Things can always be worse.  People can slow you down, but they can't stop you unless you allow them to do so.  

What matters most to you?

How others feel when they are around me.  I know what it feels like to be around those who are more than happy to dim your light so theirs will shine brighter, and I never want to be placed in that category of people.  When people are around me, I want them to know they are special and that they matter to me.

Life can get pretty crazy and there are a lot of distractions and things to get us off track. How do you keep what matters most to you in the forefront of your life?

By reminding myself that stuff is just stuff.  People, and our relationships with them are what matters most.  Obviously, I can't please everyone.  But, even in those moments when I don't see eye to eye with someone, or simply can't stand them, I'm still going to do all that I can to be kind to those around me.  Though I can't control the actions of others, I can control my own; and never want a day to go by in which I feel that I didn't live up to my full potential.

If you could give one message to those reading this what would it be?

Life is hard, but it is beautiful too.  People make it beautiful.  YOU make it beautiful because you matter!  

Reminders.

Last week was a busy one. We went home for Thanksgiving and family time. It was great! For Thanksgiving we spent it out at Uncle Tom's cabin. Seriously... It's my Uncle Tom and Aunt Kay's cabin. I have loved going out there growing up and now I love being able to take my kids. Cooper had to be with his dad this Thanksgiving though so being out there without him was hard. He loves it there. But it was great to spend a couple days with my family. I love them so much.

The day after Thanksgiving we were so blessed to get to have Cooper baptized with his cousin Mason. Those two have been buds since birth and for them to be able to share this special step in life was great. Cooper was baptized in the same baptismal font I was baptized in oh so many years ago. It was so amazing and I am so proud of him. He has grown up to be such a special boy. Before he was baptized we made sure to spend time these last couple months to really talk to him about the purpose of baptism and how important this decision is. We read scriptures, watched videos, and talked a lot about what it means to be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. We talked to him about the gift of the Holy Ghost and our promise we make when we are baptized. We asked him questions and let him ask us questions. And as it grew closer to his baptism day I truly felt a peaceful feeling that told me that Cooper was ready and knew what he was doing. I can't wait to watch him grow and be a part of his growth in the gospel.

So after Thanksgiving on Thursday and Cooper's baptism on Friday I am more thankful than ever before for the life I have chosen to live with the people I love and in the state I love! And I am so very thankful that each and every day I am given little (and sometimes big) reminders of what life is really about and what matters most in life.

Here are a few of those reminders I received last week...

Sunrise Thanksgiving morning. This is my favorite time of day at one of my favorite spots on earth.

A little snuggle time with daddy.

She discovered a little patch of snow and was so curious. She hasn't really played in snow yet since she was so tiny last winter.

She loved exploring and running around. 

This is one of my favorite photos ever. She sat there and played with a couple sticks, a rock and the grass for so long. This my friends is childhood unplugged!

One of the photos Dustin took while they were fishing in the creek. I have tubed and played in this creek many times and I need to take Coop tubing next summer!

Love these two so much. I just wish Cooper could have been there too. 

The sunset Thanksgiving day was beyond beautiful! I seriously went all the way around and filled the sky with the most amazing colors! My family has a love for the clouds and sky so we were all out taking photos and enjoying this beauty.

SERIOUSLY PEOPLE! The skies in Utah are so amazing!

Me and my girl enjoying the sunset.

And aren't Miss Molly's piggies so adorable!

Cooper and his cousin Mason. Cousins are the very best!

Our little family after Cooper's baptism. I am so blessed to call them mine.

XOXO,

Katie

To my Mr on his birthday.

(I can't tell you how much I love this picture!)

Today my husband is celebrating his 32nd birthday. WOOHOO!!!  I won't go on and on (although I want to) about how amazing he is and how much I FREAKIN love him. He would just get embarrassed. Instead I will just say this... 

Dear Husband,

I am eternally grateful for the blessing you are in my life and the lives of our children. I love you more than words can say. And I will do all I can all my life and forever to prove to you how much I truly love you. Thank you for putting up with the emotional roller coaster that is my life. Thank you for being such a great cook. Thank you for making me see life differently and for making me chill out when I need to. Thank you for almost always being the first one to apologize after a fight. I promise to be less stubborn. Thank you for making me laugh and smile when I want to be mad at you. But most of all... Thank you for letting me love you and  for loving me in return. I can't wait to spend the next 32 years with ya!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Love ya!

XOXO,

Mrs. Dotson

To Do List- Be Organized.

I am not an organized person. But I would like to be! But I just have such a hard time with it. When I turned 32 last month I decided I would do things that I was afraid of... I would conquer my fears!!! Well... I haven't done so great with that. And although my lack of organization isn't a "fear" per say, my fear is that I am not good enough at being a housewife/homemaker. I have fallen back on the excuse that I am just not that kind of person. But I think it's time to be honest with myself and admit that I need to be better with organizing my day to day life.

Now I want to clarify... I am not talking about a sparkling clean house and a step by step meal plan and a cute basket for a certain item. that goes in it's own little spot. My home will never be "magazine" worthy because we live in our home. And I don't know how anyone keeps a place completely de-cluttered. What I am talking about is organizing my life better so that the things that are most important get done and I don't lose or forget. I am pretty sure I have ADD because I get SO distracted and instead of just getting something done I get a bunch of things started... and never finished! You should see my bedroom! I decided to go through our clothes and hey are still all over waiting to be put away. It's not good... If I have to get something done then I have to make a list and make sure it is where I will for sure see it or chances are it will slip through the cracks of all the craziness!

Another problem I have is that I procrastinate! I put things off or forget about them until it is too late or I am running around like a crazy person trying to get it done at the last minute. Time is a gift and it needs to be used the best way possible. Sometimes I know I'm using my time wisely. But I am afraid that I'm more often than not just wasting it. And I can't help but wonder what I could accomplish if I was more efficient with my days... Learn to sew... Workout... Do my hair in more than a pony tail... Write a book... Learn a dance on YouTube... Grow my own business... Save the world...

So.. Here's my reason for this post. I NEED YOUR HELP!!! What do you do to keep organized? What are your tips and tricks to keep the things that matter and need to be done at the top of your list? And if you are needing help like I am what do you feel are your problem areas? I know I'm not alone in this!

I found this video on Facebook and had to share because sadly... it is so me. Except it love to read to the kidlets and I do laundry everyday... I just don't ever get around to folding it and putting it away.

Every Life Matters Q&A - ME!

OK... So I slacked and didn't get my questions sent out in time to the person I wanted to be this weeks Q&A guest. So... I decided I might as well do it myself.

Here's my E.L.M. Q&A...

Tell us a bit about yourself?

Hi. I'm Katie. LDS. Wife. Mama. Utah girl. I grew up in the most beautiful little town in Southern Utah. Have you heard of Panguitch? Chances are you have because I am always meet people who know someone who has lived there or you have driven through at some point. I love that lil town. My childhood was a dream living in such a great place.  Because I grew up in such a beautiful area I grew to love the outdoors and the beauty that is Utah! I love to go on adventures with my little family and explore our awesome place we call home. If you have read my blog or follow my on Instagram you know that I am married to the most amazing man and that I am blessed to be the mama to 2 gloriously awesome kids. I love my family! I love being a wife! My husband is so important to me and I just love our relationship. I also love being a mama! When I was little I only wanted to be 2 things when I grew up... A mom & a singer! Looks like I got my wish. I don't get paid lots of money to sing all over the world but I do get paid in loves and smiles and snuggles and kisses to sing to and with my babies in our home and the car. I say that's a much better deal. Something else I want to share about myself is that I have struggled with depression and confidence issues since... Well... For a long time. Only recently have I really been able to break the walls down that I had up and truly learn to love myself. My depression is something I know I will never get rid of but instead I have learned to cope and live with it. Learning about myself and who I am has helped me more than I could ever say. I haven't really wrote about it on my blog because I don't want to focus on it. But I know I will end up writing about it when the time feels right. The purpose for my blog is to spread love and happiness. I love life! And hope that by sharing my thoughts and doing this Every Life Matters Q&A series that I can help others find their happiness and know that they matter. A couple other things to know about me are.... I love music!!!! I am always listening to music or singing a song in my head. My dream world would be like a musical where everyone just burst out into song and dance. I hate microfiber rags and cotton balls! The thought of just touching them makes me cringe. I love love love to laugh! And I absolutely love to be a dork and dance and lip sync! I guess that's about it... for now anyway.

Who matters to you?

I have so many people in my life who matter to me. Of course at the top of my list is my family. But my husband matters to me more than anyone else. Our relationship matters more than anything. He came into my life when I had decided to just be a single mom cause there wasn't going to be anyone out there right for me. I was happy where my life was at and was kind of worried that a man might mess that up if I dated. To be honest... I didn't think I was lovable. I had been divorced for 3 yrs and my previous marriage and the divorce had done a lot of damage. But I wasn't able to keep my mind off of that guy after a friend of mine tricked me into meeting him. I fell so madly in love with him and I am so thankful that he is my love. He matters to me more than words can say!

How do you show him that he matters to you?

I try to take care of him. And not just by cleaning and cooking. I actually suck at that! He does most of the cooking and our house is not magazine worthy. I try to take care of him emotionally and tell him that I love him and a reason why. And although I know he isn't ever excited about it when I want to "talk" about our relationship and lives, I know he is thankful for it afterward. He matters to me and our marriage matters! Sometimes I get caught up in my own crap though and forget that I need to give him more time and thought.  I think too many couples forget to put the time that is needed into each other and their marriage. I pray for him so many times a day that he will be able to know through my actions and efforts just how loved he is. I love how embarrassed he gets when I compliment him or get all cheesy. He's gonna love this! LOL

Tell us about a time in your life when someone has made you feel like you mattered.

Well I don't want this to become a "my husband is awesome" interview... although he is... And he has really done so much for me and my healing. I felt very worthless before he came along. But other than all the times my husband has made me feel like I mattered and all the times my kids have made me feel the same... So the first that comes to mind (that isn't my husband or kids) happened last July. I had gone to an event called Bright Night Event and to be honest I was so nervous. I had been working so hard on my confidence and self image problems for a few months but I was nervous to go to this event with so many amazing impressive women. Normally I would have just kept to myself and not let anyone get to know the real Katie. But on my way I decided to just be silly goofy dorky self and to put myself out there and be sociable. I ended up having the time of my life and truly having a breakthrough with my journey of finding and loving myself. The women I met that day were interested in ME! The real ME! They opened their circles of friendship and welcomed me into it. I left that night feeling pleasantly shocked. And since then a lot of those women have come to be close friends that mean so much to me.

Tell us about a time in your life when you haven't felt like you mattered.

Gosh... I didn't realize this one would be so hard to answer. Hmm... Well I have had times here and there in my life when I have had someone be unkind to me... Lots of memories from my school years. And there have been times in my adult life. But the first that really stands out and I think was a factor in my problems of low self esteem and all that is when I was in elementary school. I wrote about it before in one of my first post on the blog. There was a girl that was very mean and unkind to me and she said things to me that were untrue but that I believed. She went out of her way to make me feel badly throughout my childhood and into my teenage years... It sucked. That is one of the reasons I was so nervous to have my own daughter. Because girls can be so mean! And even if you raise your daughter to be kind and loving... She becomes the target for the mean girls...

                                         

 

 How did you overcome that?

Honestly, I don't think I fully have overcome it. I am in the process.... But not all the way. I have made a lot of progress by being happy with who I am and realizing that all the things she said and the way she made me feel were not my problems but hers! I'm 32 years old and it is finally clicking that I wasn't less important and the things she told me about myself were not true. This is why I want to do what I can to teach moms, dads, kids... everyone that EVERY LIFE MATTERS and that EVERYONE deserves KINDNESS! As a mom I know how important it is to give my kids these life lessons and teach them kindness and compassion for one another.

What matters most to you?

My religion and faith in Jesus Christ. I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Throughout my life I have come to know of the importance of the gospel in my life and I am so grateful for it in my life. My testimony has grown stronger and stronger throughout my life and all of it's ups and downs. I know that without my relationship with my Heavenly Father and His Son Jesus Christ that I would not have been able to rise above my trials. I would not be who I am today. I can't even imagine my life without the knowledge of Their love for me. Everything I have... My family... My individuality... My interests... it is all because God loved me enough to send His only begotten son to be crucified for us. I know of it's truth and I am so blessed.

Life can be pretty crazy and sometimes what matters most can get lost in all the day to day things to do and worries of life. How do you keep what matters most in the forefront of your life?

That is a hard thing to do. Sometimes I get caught up in the world and what it thinks should matter. Like i said in my last post, I know where true happiness comes from and when I lose sight of that them I get lost and forget. I know that I have to keep prayer at the top of my list and doing all I can to live a Christlike life. I also know that I have to keep my family and our needs at the top as well. The happiness of my family will not be determined on how big our house is or how popular we are or even how many followers my blog has. Our happiness can be eternal if we live a kind and loving life centered around the teaching of Christ and His gospel.

If you could give one message to those reading this what would it be?

Be kind. That's it. Our words and actions create what the future will become. There is a huge "kindness movement" going around and I am loving it! But how much are you really doing to help it along? Are you saying one thing but doing another? What do your children see you do each day? What are we teaching the next generation? I think we need to really focus on teaching our children to be kind and loving to all. And we need to teach them that EVERY LIFE MATTERS! Even if someone is different or wants different things than us it does not mean that they are weird or that something is wrong with them. Everyone has a story and deserves to be treated with kindness and respect. And the only way to do that is by example!!! Let's teach our children what really matters in life.... Each other!!!

XOXO

Katie